Human Givens - Needs

All humans beings have certain things in common. We call the things which nature gives us when we are born the "givens of human nature" or the "Human Givens". We can divide these "givens" into human needs and human resources. The human needs which we all share include the following:

•  Food, shelter and security

•  The need for attention

•  The need for emotional connection

•  Fun, friendship and intimacy

•  Autonomy and control

•  A sense of privacy

•  A sense of competence and achievement

•  A sense of status

•  To feel part of a community

•  A sense of purpose though being stretched

 Food, shelter and security

The most fundamental human need is for nourishment, a roof over our heads and a sense of security. It is very hard to live a healthy life if these basics are not present in our life. Refugees all over the world know how important it is to have a place to stay where you are not threatened and have sufficient food and water.

 The need for attention

We all need to give and receive attention. As all parents know, children need attention almost more than they need food. They will do anything which grabs the attention of their parents, even including behaviour which is painful to themselves and everyone else around. Note that any kind of attention is better than none - we don't need to distinguish between "good" and "bad" attention, just between "getting" and "not getting" attention. Without attention we cannot survive. But we fulfil this need in many different ways. Just a few minutes of quality attention can sometimes "feed us" for weeks. If our innate need for the attention of other human beings is not met we will seek other ways to fill the void.

Skills we need to develop as we grow up include how to focus our attention, hold it and also how to disengage to become aware of our surroundings. We must learn both to connect and to disconnect in order to stay healthy.

As social beings we interact with others, and we tend to be drawn towards people who are in some ways "like us". Our friends usually have something in common with us - even if only our shared culture. However, it is only through the mechanism of exchanging attention with others that we find out what we ourselves are really like. This is one of the reasons why people who live completely on their own sometimes lose an objective view of their own strengths and weaknesses.

When you start to recognise the importance and power of attention in our daily lives, you will start to see that in many ways it is a currency at least as important as money. It explains our current celebrity culture, the power of advertising and why people will do almost anything to be on TV as well as the success of websites such as YouTube, MySpace and Friends Reunited.

 The need for emotional connection

We need to be emotionally connected to others. Again, this need can be fulfilled in many ways. We do not all have a partner to whom we can connect emotionally. We may enjoy the shared emotion of a live sporting event or a social event. How do you meet your own need for an emotional connection to others?

 Fun, friendship and intimacy

We do not all have work which is fun but we all have a need to have fun sometime. We are social beings and we need friends. We also need to be able to share our thoughts and feelings with others. More and more people live in isolation these days and the TV cannot meet our needs for fun, friendship and intimacy. When we feel that we are un-loveable and have no friends our instincts tell us this is a problem.

 Autonomy and control

Without a sense that we are in some way in control of our own lives we can become extremely stressed. Road rage, hanging on the phone to call centres, Council Tax bills - all these things cause us stress when they become symbols for the lack of control which we have over our own affairs. Stroppy two year old's often discover and test the limits of their control over their own world. As adults we need to feel that we have some control over our own lives.

 A sense of privacy

There are times when we really need to be left alone. This can be hard to imagine in times when we feel lonely but a total lack of privacy can be as stressful as having no one to talk to. Neighbours or family who do not respect your own privacy can quickly become enemies.

 A sense of competence and achievement

We all need to feel that there is something in this world that we are good at. It may be absolutely anything, but without a sense of achievement we usually feel that something is lacking. We may feel confident in our abilities at work or we may fill this need through a hobby, through making others laugh or through our friends or families. However we achieve it we need to develop at least one skill in which we can feel capable.

 A sense of status

This one follows from the previous - a sense of competence and achievement. We all need to be reminded in some way of the things in which we have accomplished. We like to have symbols which represent our successes - however modest or grand we may think they are. We achieve this in different ways. It may simply be being appreciated for the role we take. A school janitor make have as much status as the Headmaster if he or she is valued for the work they do by everyone in the school. Status may be a treasured book or photograph. For some people it is their home or car, for others it may be their clothes or a beautiful object or a role in their community which is appreciated by others. Of course we need a sense of proportion about status but it is important to realise that we do not feel totally fulfilled without some recognition of our unique individuality.

 To feel part of a community

For many thousands of years humans have lived in close communities. In the last 100 years this aspect of our lives has been tested in ways which would have been unimaginable before the industrial revolution. Our families are now spread across the country or even across the world. Increasingly there are people who have no immediate family on which to depend. We can meet our need for a community in the pub, on the internet or hanging out with our friends. But we all need a sense of community in order to thrive as human beings.

 A sense of purpose - through being stretched

Without a sense of purpose our lives can seem pointless. We function better when we are under a certain amount of stress - not too much, but not too little either. A permanent holiday can become as stressful as no holiday at all. Almost anything which we care about can serve to meet our sense of purpose provided that we have the capacity and energy to work at it. People who have lived through times of great stress often become united in fighting a common threat. Many people apply their natural need for being stretched to acquire material wealth of positions of power.

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Last updated Fri 7 March 2008